When I first started writing this blog on pingVision, I wondered about how personal I could or should get on what ostensibly is a “professional” blog. Well, the topic came up recently on a number of business blogs, so what better time to revisit th…

One thing taken for granted in this debate, personal vs. professional, is that for increasingly more people, their heretofore-thought-of-as-”personal” lives are woven right through their professional careers. For some people, work is just work, and they don’t want to bring any of their “real” selves to the table. For me, laboring under that kind of pressure is soulless and dehumanizing, which has required me to both out myself accordingly and to accept where the chips fall, if they may.

Yes, I’m queer, and poly, and a whore, and yes, I’d much rather, as Catherine La Croix says, “I’d rather be detested for the truth than loathed for the lie.”

Although, an aside: I also get to enjoy the weird nakedness of the sex industry, where one finds oneself masturbating in front of strangers with one’s colleagues before one even knows the names of the partners of kids. (Talk about challenging one’s ideas of personal and professional…)

I wonder, after you outed yourself, did you find yourself embroiled in any “interesting” side conversations at Blogher? I suppose I came pre-outed by virtue of my blog URL, and was totally (happily) surprised at the number of sexual confidences and secrets I became party when Blogher attendees took me aside.

I must admit that I had never heard the term, polyamorous, before reading your post and had to follow your link to wikipedia. I suspected that it was similar to polygamy however; suspecting and knowing are two different things.

Am I a back-woods, uneducated Texas hick? No. I lived the better part of the 1990’s in Atlanta, GA and my job required me to spend a good bit of time in Boston, MA and Buffalo, NY. I admit that I was exposed to allot of things that you will not openly find here in Texas but polyamory was not one of them.

My personal convictions on polygamy / polyamory are not as strong as they are on homosexuality. The only problem that I have is that I don’t understand how a person can be emotionally and intimately attached to two different people at the same time. How do you deal with the jealousy, conflicts and possessiveness that are bound to show up? (no response needed)

Also, I do not believe that polyamory or polygamy is as hotly contested social issues as homosexuality is. Considering what sparked your survey, I can’t help but wonder if asking questions about homosexuality is fair to you.

I don’t understand poly, but I respect whatever you choose to do in your life.

I also, for example, don’t care if any of my colleagues are philatelists. They may perceive their interest in philately as central to their being. I do not, so it’s nearly useless information to me.

As such, I can think of no compelling reasons to prominently reveal such personal information. I’m not opposed to the revelation–unquestionably the barriers between the personal and the professional are breaking down. However, it’s a matter of little or no import.

As such, if, in the course of her professaionl blogging, Amy happened to mention her polyamorous status (say, she was at a conference with a partner, or worked on a polyamory advocacy site), that’s fine. That’s in the context of revelant professional activity. The most important thing, as Amy says, is not to make “a huge deal out of it”.

A huge, flashing sign (or entry) on a professional site that reads “I’m Polyamorous and Proud of It” would perturb me not because of Amy’s choice, but because of the egotism it implies. If I’m her colleague or client, I’m thinking: “why does she think I should care about this aspect of her personal life, when we have a professional relationship? I don’t press my on her.”

Amy’s philosophy regarding potential business won and lost is dead-on. Though I chose not to reveal as much personal information, potential clients could be repelled by statements on my site. For example, I did a chunk of volunteer work supporting gay marriage in the US. It’s possible a homophobic potential client might look elsewhere because of that. I’ve always said what Amy said–if that’s their view, then I probably don’t want to work with them.